More On That

-_- But more on that later.

I'm back at Pitt. With Liv! This semester is already much better than the previous ones, and I've only gone through the first day. I still need to drop Magic, Medicine, and Science so I can add Special Topics in Mass Comm. So far things are going pretty well. We'll see if that lasts.

Back to -_- though. I was talking with Liv about Min again. It's definitely a problem that I think about him so much. I wish I could figure out what these feelings were. *sigh* But I'm sure I've talked about that enough on here. Bleh. We were talking about what could have happened if I didn't have Mike when we met. There were a bunch of possibilities... I don't know what would have happened. What was Min looking for when he asked me to hang out after the rave that night? Saa... wakarimasen!!

I miss Robert. *pout*
_{And Min...}

Again with the "I don't know"s

I know I should be working on my essay for Rhetoric right now, but I can't help it. I'm weird.

Why is it I'm attracted to strange when all I want is normal? It's really frustrating. All of the guys I've liked since Jared have been on the weird side. Josh, Keer, hell even Min. He painted his nails, who knows what else he did. Is it because I've had an abundance of really weird that I only want normal? Grant, Josh, Albert, David. I don't know. It's like I'm a nutzo magnet. Not all the time, but it still feels like that. Sadistic, suicidal, drug addicts. Mike is the only normal one of the bunch. But I'm not satisfied. And I don't even know how I feel about him. -_- Ugh. This again.

I went to dinner on Tuesday with Becky, Rob (yay!), Alina, and Emily. Alina has a new crush and she was saying how she didn't like to be apart from him. It hurt her emotionally. She didn't want to be away from him. ... I don't feel that for Mike. Should I? Is that something I should be feeling for my boyfriend? Because I don't, does that mean he isn't right for me? AGH. I just don't know! I want to talk to someone about it, but I don't know who. Liv is probably already convinced that I shouldn't be with Mike because of that talk I had with her before. I don't know if I can trust Chelsea with it because Mike and Chels have gotten REALLY close. And I feel like there isn't anyone else who knows the situation well enough to help me. Alina would just tell me to break up with him... so would Becky. Who else is there? Mom? No. Brittany, Kayla, Misha... Maybe Brittany. She'd probably be best. Or Kayla maybe... Misha and Mike are too close at the moment. God, I don't know!

*fail*

Cool People = Fun Weekend

This weekend was probably the best I've had at college so far. Halloween night, Genevra's birthday, I went to a small party in the WPU with Genevra. I got to re-meet Juilian, and I got to meet Harold, Genevra's prospective boyfriend. Oh course there were other people there and they were all fun. I won a frozen apple pie for gathering the most lollipops out of balloons, but because I don't have a freezer or an oven, I gave it to the runnerup, Alexa. She is a very fun and sweet person. Later in the party, Malory showed up with Jonathan and his girlfriend Kelly. I was friendly, of course, but it caused internal drama-llama for Genevra. Afterwards, my crew + Malory and Julian were supposed to go get something to eat, but they others wound up walking Jonathan and whoever else to a bus stop far away and decided to get food down there instead of coming back to eat with us.

So after the party, Genevra, Harold, and I went to Fuel and Fuddle for half-off and we got better aquainted with each other. Harold is a really cool person and I hope we can become better friends. He's having problems with his ex: she wants him back and he isn't sure of his feelings. Apparently she is in Hawai'i (?) and she bought him a plane ticket without telling him so he would go visit her. Genevra definitely likes him, but she won't do anything until he figures all of that mess out. She is definitely trying to get closer to him, though. Anyway, after we went out to eat we went back to Harold's apartment... I don't really recall why... Oh! I think it was because she had left fabric and stuff there (she had helped make part of his ninja-pirate costume). We wound up giving massages to each other--apparently my back is ALL knots, not surprisingly--and talking late into the night. Genevra fell asleep somewhere around 2am-ish and Harold and I talked until about 4am. Then we all fell asleep and didn't get up until 11:30. Besides sleeping on the floor--which wasn't all that bad--it was a great time.

When we got up this morning we went to Eat N Park for food and started moving Genevra into her new apartment in the South Side. It only took us two trips because of my awesome packing job. x3 The futon was a LARGE problem, though. After much effort, we managed to stuff it into the back seat, but realized Harold wouldn't be able to see out of his rear windshield, so we had to fit it into the trunk. It didn't quite fit, but after pushing and stomping and prodding, we got in mostly in there. The trunk wouldn't close, though, so they bungied it and off we went.

By the time we got everything done, it was already 6:30. Harold had stuff to do, so they dropped me off and I've watched anime until now. I definitely need to shower before church tomorrow. I didn't expect to sleep over anywhere, so I didn't bring any deoderant and I couldn't find Harold's in the bathroom, so I wound up spraying the armpits of my shirt with Febreeze type stuff. XD I can't tell if I smell good or just odd. We'll go with odd. o_O

Anyway, I need sleep. Just because I got a decent amount of hours doesn't mean I slept well. おやすみ。

まったく。。。

I'm not sure why, but まったく (geeze...) seems to sum up my thoughts right now, like it's the recurring theme.

I finally turned in that damn metafiction paper on Tuesday. We got it back today: B-. Fail, right? I worked so hard on it. -_- She said that we can revise it again and turn it in my the end of the semester and she will take the better grade. But I never want to see that paper again! ... But I want an A... ;_;

Right now, though, I have to worry about a Rhetoric test on Tuesday and the euthanasia debate on Thursday. Tomorrow is Genevra's birthday, but I probably won't get to spend much time with her 'cause I need to research for the debate and meet up with Ethan at 4:30. I haven't gotten to spend much time with Genevra recently--it's made me lonely again. >< Pathetic. I hope she likes her presents. I'm sure she will, I'm just worried about the bracelet. It fell apart tonight when I went to put it on. Thank God I had the extra supplies. Hopefully it will be okay now.

眠りがいりますよ！
I need sleep!

Writing Slave

Wednesdays are always so full of writing. I'm "revising" my metafiction paper for O'Brien's The Things They Carried. Or rather, rewriting it. Or trying. I'm in the lounge in Holland, but there are these three girls across the room that are studying for a test in about an hour and a half in what sounds like anatomy. I don't mind it as much now beause they are acutally studying, but before the third one got here, they were just babbling about random stuff. DX

No one's ever had a problem with my English writing until now. I know Prof. Schwartz doesn't mean to be mean, but she just tears my papers to shreds. I'll be so glad when the semester's over.

I also have to write an Argument paper today. >p This is way too much writing.

~~~

Why am I so attentive when it comes to words? I'm horrible at using them myself, but when they are said or written out in front of me, I'm very particular about the words used and what they mean. For example, the assignment on metafiction: the paper is saying to "Show particular examples (using specific quotes from the text) of O'Brien's use of metafiction and explain how that technique qualifies it (or doesn't?) as metafiction." So I've been focusing on proving that it's metafiction 'cause that's what it says. But I just got off the phone with Prof. Schwartz and she was saying that I'm supposed to focus on how and why it's being used. Maybe I'll talk to her about that tomorrow... if she has a minute or two after class. How I'm not understanding/misinterpreting what she is looking for and that's why I don't get it.

I answer questions based on wording. I'm a weirdo. (-_- )( -_-)

=_=

Here's a repetitive entry: I'm lonely!! And it's only Friday!

Genevra is on her way to North Carolina with her friend Malory to meet someone Mal met online. It's a good thing that Malory isn't going alone, but now I don't have anything to do this weekend except for homework. I want to meet up with Keer at some point, but he hasn't gotten back to me on when would be best. It's a three day weekend (Yay Fall break), so I can pretty much hang whenever.

So bored... I guess I'll start reading those articles for Rhetorical Process...

Boss Monty and Black Dona

I have a laptop! *cheers* Dude, it's a Dell. XD This thing rocks! Although the wireless is schizo.

In other news, I stayed at Mike's last night until about 1:30am and then came home and went to bed. Andrea calls me at 7:30am asking if I can come in a work, 'cause Ian's sick/partied too hard after the football game last night. -_- I go in, of course. I got to hang out with Melissa most of the time, 'cause she didn't have much to do, and we always seemed to be in the same place. It was nice. Except for the fact that I have little endurance left for the horse barn, so it took forever to do, and it was raining. I didn't get out until 2 (and then stayed with Melissa until 2:30) Boo. But I got $50. w00t.

It's Saturday night and I need to write 3 papers (approx. 2 pgs. each) and do lots of other homework. I should have been working on that, but I was putting everything on my laptop instead. And tomorrow is LifeTeen, so I won't have much time to work on them. At least I don't have to work in the morning again.