Goodbye 2007

December 31st already. It's been a long time since I've typed a journal entry... I think my last real one was before we went to visit Matthew, Stephanie, and Eve-chan. They are up right now; we just opened Christmas presents from/for them. I got a how-to-survive-college book and this funky "WTF is that" stuffed animal. It looks like a blueT-Rex/marsupial/Chihuahua... weird. I <3 it. Unfortunately, I have to work in the morning, so I'm gonna go to bed until I have to drive Isaac home from Alison's. At least we won't have a repeat of last year. -_-

Nobu was here for a while. I really hope those two stay together. She is so sweet. ^_^ Although sometimes it feels like Isaac talks to her like she is a little kid. >:( She gave me Origami Love Notes. I've already used a couple of sheets. Some of those are freakin' hard! Oh well. Still fun. Her X-Mas card to me was a monster, but I think I got it. ><

I posted a list of what I got for Christmas on dA, with the exception of what Mike got me, 'cause I had already posted it by then. I <3 my sewing machine!

I got to see Becky and Tia for an hour or two the other day; they were home for the weekend. Becky is the same, although she died her hair black, straightened it, and cut it to about shoulder length. I'm not sure what Tia did, but she looked really cute when I saw her. Something about the new shade of her hair and her glasses frames really brought out her eyes. She had some curls in there too. Too cute.

Mike and I are doing fine. He and, like, everyone else are complaining that I'm leaving for Pitt so early. I can't help that! Well, he's spending the night with Adam and, maybe, Marita. We just found out that Maura Elizabeth is not Adam's girl. She's... that guy from McDonald's: Marita's boss, I think. There are mixed emotions about that whole situation. I don't know if I should tell Mom or not. Mike is kinda glad that it's not Adam's because he didn't want it to ruin Adam's life. I suppose I wanted her to be Adam's so I could pretend Marita was... semi decent, I guess. I don't know. Apparently, she was cheating on Adam before and after she knew she was prego. Adam tried to kick her out of his house, where she's been staying apparently, and she threatened to kill herself. That's pretty low and it definitely hurts my opinion of her. All of this situation does. I don't know what's going to happen with that relationship. Right now Adam is trying to get his name off of Maura's birth certificate. I guess we're all kinda hoping the relationship comes to an end, but Mike says he can still tell he loves Marita.

I need to go see Sarah, Chelsea, and Liv by Friday. Since they start school in two days, I'm gonna try seeing them all tomorrow, but I don't know how that will work out... I think Chelsea already has plans... Well, if worst comes to worst, I'll just leave their presents at their houses.

I can't believe I'm going to Pitt in four days... I haven't even started packing! I've talked with my roommate, Sara, through Facebook and she seems like an awesome person; I think we'll turn out to be good friends. Liv is still trying to fight her way into Pitt. I don't know what's going to happen there. She is waiting for a reply from Penn State to see if she got into there as a backup. I hope she makes it to Pitt: for her sake. It's where she's always wanted to go.

I got to hang out with Alina and Emily at a sleepover a while ago. Becky was supposed to come, but she didn't show. This is the conclusion I made that night: Every time she disappoints me, I get more bitter. Yeah, I think sums it up nicely. Well, at least Alina is still a pretty good friend.

I got to see some more of that group of friends when Mike Cornell had a party last week. I got to see him, SAM, Alina, Mono, SAM, Brad, Dom, SAM, and a couple others. I miss Sam. T^T I miss a lot of people.

Here's to 2007. May 2008 be a better year.

Mom

I love Mom. ^_^ <3 She's the greatest person ever. No one can ever take her place. <3

Becky Dream

Part of my dream last night was weird. Becky came home, but she didn't tell me. I only found out because Chelsea mentioned it in her dA journal. Becky was performing in the Bakerstown Annex and I was really upset no one told me. When I got to the Annex, they had the bleachers from the Life Teen house (only bigger) set up to the left and there was a crowd of fans on them. They were cheering and shouting like Becky was an idol. I sat down in the back toward the right side of the room with my knees to my chest. I didn't recognize any of the songs, but I knew them in the dream. She was painted up like you would expect her to be for a performance. The wall behind her had an abstract, fae-like version of her face.

I miss Becky.

Phantom Pitt

Mike and I went to Phantom Fright Night last night. There was so much traffic getting there. >_< And the park was so crowded. We only went on the bumper cars, Volcano, and Phantom's revenge. We also went through a haunted house called Vampire Villa. It was pretty good. By that point it was near closing time, so we came home. I got four hours of sleep before I had to go to work. Luckily, Ian was working so it wasn't too bad. That and Andrea was gone. w00t!

Mom and I just went through all of the Pitt stuff for housing and dining and stuffs for spring. DX Oh well. At least it's done. Now I jsut have to do all the other stuff like go see a counselor. Bleh. It's coming up fast.

Tears for Sa Sa

Well this week really sucked at work. First Red dies and now Salem is dead. Yeah. I guess Eric had to put him down yesterday, though I don't know why. I always thought we would lose Wizard before Salem. *sigh* Tommy told me this morning. I was confused when he said Salem died. I thought he meant Red but said Salem. I wish that was the case. :'( We were both still sad about Red and now even more sad about Sa Sa. I swear Tommy had tears in his eyes. ;_;

くそ！！

Damn it. Mike and I went too far again tonight. I wound up practically hyperventilating and was all tingle-y. He said he wants to talk about it tomorrow morning before classes, so we'll see what happens.

Red Butterfly

Friday night Mike and I went to Scarehouse down in Etna. It consisted of two building with a maze you walk through with all the typical scares. Although I didn't get scared, I'd say it was the best I've been to. The people dressed up were really creepy and did a good job. The wait to get in took about 2 or so hours. >_< There was a girl in front of us who I swear was high. She was with her friend (boyfriend?) and her dad. She wouldn't stop talking! I wanted to punch her in the face. -_- There was a couple behind us and we talked to them and wound up going through the buildings with them. Overall it was fun.

Eve was born on Saturday. I'm an aunt! w00t! Here are all the stats.
Oct. 13, 2007 12:07 pm
7 lbs. 7oz.
19 3/4 inches
C-section
Poor Stephanie just wouldn't dilate so they had to do a C-section to get Eve out. That and Eve wasn't in the right position. Isn't she cute! ^_^

We will be going down to visit them on the 26th.

Dad is such a jerk. When we told him Eve was born his response was "Oh. Okay." >_< Then he started complaining about the doctors being impatient about births because she was born C-section. Jerk.

That night Dad and I went to see the opera Madama Butterfly. It was wonderful! It was so SAD though. I think everyone in the audience cried. ;_; I'm glad I wasn't the only one.

Poor Mary. Red died this morning. His intestines were twisted around four times and he was in intense pain, so she made the choice to put him down. It's so sad. Those two were meant for each other. :'(

Fine Print and Copper Pennies

We didn't have Statistics on Monday and we found out why today at the end of class. He has been sick since the first time he was out and he finally got tired of it and bought extra-strength medicine this morning. Everything was fine until during his Calc. class right before Stats. He started getting all of those symptoms in fine print, but didn't know what was going on since it was so long after he took the medicine. So he went straight to the doctor's, got blood work done and had some x-rays taken. Nothing was wrong, obviously. We don't have class on Friday either, which means I don't have to get up at some hideous hour to get to class on time. XD Yes!

Right now I have a copper penny bandaged to my bee sting. Scott from sculpture class recommended it when I asked for a bee sting remedy. It's supposed to neutralize the venom. Of course it would have worked better if I'd done it right after I got stung, but oh well.

Speaking of sculpture, I really need to figure out what I'm going to do for my furniture project. :/ We'll see what happens.

Fuck Bees

Ugh. Where do I start? Fuck bees. That's a good start. Yesterday, Sunday, I get home and fall asleep on the couch- I haven't been sleeping well -and Dad wakes me up saying if I just gonna "sit around doing nothing" I should go help Mom stain the deck. Well if I thwarted him at that point, he would yell at me, so I went outside and helped Mom. I wouldn't have minded, except he woke me up to go work. Obviously if I am tired enough to fall asleep on the couch, I shouldn't be working. I showed Mom how we waterproofed the ramps in MI and we got the top deck done pretty quickly. We started working on the lower deck and I noticed a bees' nest under the hot tub. Well, as long as I didn't bother them I would be okay. Yeah. Sure. I swept and, as I was telling Mom the Dane Cook joke about bees, one stung the under/side of my right foot. Fuck bees. So now it stings and itches.

I came close to breaking up with Mike today. He got me angry yesterday during the staining project and he asked me again if I still wanted to go out with him. You would think he would figure out that him asking that just makes me more angry. It's like he has no faith in me or the relationship. So I came close to doing it. I was just about prepared to do it at work, considering how much I think there. But no, we're still together. We'll see how long that lasts.

No school tomorrow! It's a "Professional Day." AKA an in-service day. w00t! I'm thinking about visiting everyone at the high school and seeing how they are doing. We'll see, depending on how long I sleep in... and whether that is good sleep or not. *shrug*

How Dumb am I?

So a couple things have happened since my last entry. On Tuesday Nate, that guy in the back of my Psych. class, stopped at my desk before class again and when I asked him "what?" he said I get more beautiful every time he sees me. O_O So now I've got two guys in Psych. after me. >_<>_<>_<), and got scratched up because of it. Just the arms this time. I was wearing pants 'cause it was chilly this morning. I will probably go see the band today. It's their home show. We'll see.

DAMN IT!! THE REST OF THIS POST WAS EATEN AGAIN!! It was how I got up at 3 to go to work at 4, got through half a wing and realized I had taken that day off. -_- Hayed, swept, wrote a note on part of a feed bag with a dry erase marker, told Tommy, found out the office had been open, left the note there and left.

I don't remember what else was in here. ;_;

Again.

Oh man. I just took another Stats test and I did really badly. I studied for it and I though I knew it, but, of course, I blanked out when I sat down to do it. -_- Now I need to start writing my comparison essay for English and type up a few scripts for speech. Stupid commercial speeches...

Not So Dead Bird...

So I didn't pwn that test in psych. I barely got a B on it. ;( Well, she drops one test grade if we do the project, so as long as I do well on the other tests, I'll be okay.

They liked my hideous monster (as I have taken to calling my Noren sculpture project). I don't know why, although it does make me feel better that people didn't agree with me. I still don't like it, though, so I made a new project in the hour he gave us (which I used most of trying to fix up my noren). I like that one better but I might use it for the jewelry section we are in now. :/ We'll see. I'm thinking about a Kodama bobblehead for the furniture project. XD

Saturday I walked into work and there was a dead Blue Jay in the aisle. *shudder* I would have been alright with it, except it twitched as I walked past it. The way it was... mutilated? Made it look like its sight kept on following me. It reminded me of the eye in Poe's The Telltale Heart. Creepy! So when Andrea came in I told her about the bird and she went over and looked at it. "Huh. It's not dead!" Duh! Didn't I just tell you it twitched? Well, she got rid of it, so it was okay. DX

I have to give a personal experience speech on Wednesday. I'm thinking about using the bird... 'cause I can't think of any others. -_- My life has no interesting stories. Maybe I'll just make one up and pretend it happened. *shrug*

Nervous

Pysch test in an hour... Sculpture project due tomorrow.

Help.

I so pwned that test! 50 questions, 10 minutes. XD Now I just have to do my sculture project...

Slime, Snails, and Puppy dog tails

So sick. Must work on sculpture project... study for Psych test... >_< Ugh.

Mike's Dad is in pretty bad condition. He has a heart problem and the medication he used last time started killing his liver too. I hope he gets better.

くそ！

Uh! Things are so frustrating with Mike. It will seem like he doesn't want me around, but he'll complain as soon as I'm gone that he didn't want me to leave and he really needs me. Well by then I'm keeping sick Sarah company (she's contagious*sniffle*) and I'm not gonna go back because I'm agitated by him. Then, of course, I feel bad so I start to go back to his house but he texts me and says he's somewhere along the train tracks. He says he's doubting our relationship. >_< Conclusion: we need to communicate better.

What am I going to do with my life?! >_< I don't know if I really want to go into Japanese. I think I just got infatuated with it because of Liv's enthusiasm over it. But now I feel like if I don't, I'll be letting her down. くそ！ I hate the fact that I have to figure out what I want to do with my life at age 18. I'm still a kid! How should I know? ;_;

Just kill me now.

Ground Zimbardo

September 11. Wow, 6 years ago the U.S. got attacked. It doesn't seem like it was that long ago. But when I think about when I heard it, I realize just how long ago it was. I was sitting in Mr. Watson's science class when either the principal or the vice came over the intercom and told us to turn on the TVs. I don't think anyone of us really understood what just happened. That could be a good thing, I guess. It didn't really hit anyone until we fully understood, and by then, we weren't in school so we wouldn't be embarrassed if we broke down. :( Damn. So many people died.

We watched a Phil Zimbardo movie in Psych today. I really wanted to call Mr. Gross and tell him, but I just wrote him an email instead. XD Chris and I went to Subway afterwards and havered (yeah I actually used it X)). I then went to Mike's house and we hung for a while. It, somehow, got pretty heated up, but we didn't do anything.

No work on Friday! w00t!

Frozen Bruises

I woke up at 4:30 this morning to go to work because I knew none of the horses were going out last night and I didn't know if I had to do both sides or not. Thankfully I didn't and I was able to come home and study for my Stats test, which I think I did well on... Classes went fine. I hung out with Jake Seaman and Jacob Cook during my break after stats and we sat around Jacob's car and listened to Japanese music.

After classes, Mike and I ate at Pizza Hut so Mike could get some food into him before his Java class. We were in the car, pulling out of the lot when we realized we had forgotten our pizza box. -_- So I pulled into a spot and Mike went in to get it. And who walked out of the restaurant to say hi? Tommy. Yeah, that's right. Completely and awesomely unexpected. So Mike finally got to meet him and stuffs, but it was still all good.

I was going to get a fudge sickle out of the freezer and a can of OJ fell on my foot. Can you say 'pain'? I've had ice on it since then and it looks okay. Just like one frozen bruise.

J's Mats

Ugh. Hard day at work today. I had to fix Jasper's mats. >_< style="font-style: italic;">forever. And Andrea didn't have any help, so I had to do other stuff like top off, hay, and sweep. Oh well.

Life Teen started today. ^_^ There were 6 singers including myself. *_* And a shit load of instruments. We also had a new song that didn't go over too well. Oh well.

I need to help Liv find some stuff for her outfit for Tekko in April. Hey, the sooner to get started on it, the better. I'll be, like, 10 minutes away while I'm at Pitt. X) Happy!

Bed. Work. >_<

Still...?

Why is it the first half of the wing goes really quickly but the second half takes forever?? Maybe it's because Melissa is there by then... I had to move hay in the rain. >_< Not fun. When I got home, I was so tired I slept on a beach towel on my floor because I didn't want to get the bed covered in hay. Mom asked me later why I didn't just put the towel on the bed. (*_*) Because that would be the smart thing to do, so I didn't think about it. 'Cause I'm dumb.

Mom and I went shopping at Target and I got some more clothes I don't need and a new bathing suit. While I was trying it on, my body suddenly decided I wasn't over being sick, so I had to hurry to the bathroom when I got out. I thought I was done with this! *sigh* Oh well.

Leaky Faucet

Today wasn't all that exciting. I woke up at 3 and as soon as my head cleared, I got my period. Why went I get it I don't bleed? I leak! It's soo annoying. Literally, I'm like a leaky faucet. -_- Anyway. I didn't sleep very well after that, so I was tired by the time 5 rolled around and I had to get up for work. By then the cramps had set in, so I didn't want to eat anything. I forced down a bowls of Fruitloops and got all but 5 stalls on the left done before Andrea showed up and told me to start cleaning the right. Xþ Well, I got done with enough time to take a shower and gather my things before I took Mike to class. The bum was late. I could have eaten! Instead I bummed some peanut butter Captain Crunch off of him.

Classes were fine. Mike didn't have Trig today so we hung out by the playground during my hour break. We thought about hitting up the home football game, but I decided I didn't want to and fell asleep while Mike stole my internet. We ate dinner (spaghetti!) and hung out until I kicked him out at 20 till 10.

I hate cramps.

Yes! >_<

This post just got eaten. X( Now I have to retype most of my rant.

K, so Tommy got a new job excavating, so I'm pretty much doing stalls on my own now. >_<

Yeah. Psyc class today. Fun random conversions with Nate and the guy behind me, Chris. Called Puerto Ricans crazy. Said 'hey!' I'm a quarter Puerto Rican. Apologized after class. Asked if he could make it up to me by taking me out. Told him I didn't know how my boyfriend would feel about that. Told him we could do something sometime, though. Didn't hit me until driving home. NORMAL GUY. Holy crap. FINALLY! A normal guy! Besides Mike. Not a Josh, not another Albert, just a normal guy. Yeah. I was excited about that.

Mr. Humphrey came by tonight because he has to go to some place south of the turpike for work. I don't know. But he's sleeping over tonight. I hope I don't wake him in the morning.

Work Dreams

I'm feeling much better. I didn't get my period today, which is good, I guess. But I have to work every morning from tomorrow through Monday and I really don't want to start getting cramps at work. >_<

Heck, I had a work dream this morning where the right wing was about the size of both put together. The thing was all but, like, five of the stalls were empty so it was really easy. Not to mention, it was about as clean and bright as the wing at SRU. I wish. I think Tommy bought the barn and had Andrea working under him. >) There was a slightly larger girl there that kinda resembled Bergen and had her voice, but it wasn't her. That was sad. I miss Bergen. ;(

Bleh!

Okay. Still sick. I hate this!

Today...?

Yay! I... pretty much got that corner cleaned. Well, it's a lot better than it was. Now as soon as I am done eating, I'll be able to start on my funky noren. Today is my art lab, so I'll be at school from 12 till 9ish. Normally, that isn't bad, but I'm supposed to get my period today. >_< So I'm gonna freak every time I feel like it could be. Well, I'll just bring lots of stuff and hope I catch it.

AARGH love is like some loot!

The tv corner of my room is such a mess! I'm just about to clean it... maybe I'll find buried treasure! Or maybe some right triangles...

Robert seems to be very happy. I have just given him free reign and the promise of $30. My God, what have I done?

Wy can't she?

Why can't my mom support me in what I want to do with my life? I mean, she's supported me in almost everything else in my life. Why can't she understand that now that I have a choice, I'm going to go with one that will make me happy? She is so frustrating. -_- This rant would have been much longer, but I got to rant to Mike about it.

I really hope I love Mike. Yeah he doesn't always say the right things or understand all the time, but I'm not looking for Mr. Perfect. I want Mr. Right-For-Me. He could be it. The more I am with him, the more I think he is. But I really hope I am not deluding myself. That would suck. He's pretty much everything I could ever hope for in a guy. I'm not letting him go until I know for sure.

>_<

I hate being sick! Especially when it is d...

Man I hope that was the last of it. It felt like my 20min. sickness, so it could be. Damn. Aloe vera has never hurt so badly in my life. I'm squirming! Oh the pain...

Why?

I'm not sure why I made this blog. I have others... Maybe I just need one that no one else knows about.